Coming Clean–All About ME!

In the interests of telling the full story of who I am, here are a few snippets of me that you may not have encountered just yet.

1. My husband and I went to High School together, we didn’t become a couple until after we left school but we were good friends for a few years before that. The first time I went to his parent’s house for dinner, his dad got me so plastered I put my feet on the dining table to show them my new shoes, then walked into the toilet door before passing out on the front veranda when Luke took me home. People think its a little strange, but we always call each other “mate”.

2. I love to dance, depending on my mood I listen to just about any kind of music, but something that makes my ass shake is a definite winner in my book. In my head I look kind of like this -

But in all honesty I probably look much closer to this -

3. I also love to sing, far more than people like to listen to me. Luke has actually walked into the house to tell me to keep it down because the neighbours were giving him funny looks. My absolute favourite singing location is in the car – I am that crazy woman at the lights oblivious to you watching me as I belt out my own disgraceful version of anything from Ben Harper to Amy Winehouse to Kings of Leon.

4. I swear like a wharfie. So far, I have managed to keep my potty-mouth in check on here, but talking to me in person is best likened to having a conversation with Billy Connolly. I am not adverse to dropping an inappropriate F-Bomb when the mood strikes and have a bit of a reputation for using the C-word, I usually put a Y on the end of it because it somehow sounds funnier that way. I have always maintained that sometimes there is no other way to fully express your feelings on a subject.

5. I used to be a Wedding Coordinator. It was the same year that we were planning our own wedding so I was in my element seeing all these beautiful weddings every week. It was also handy to have our own wedding at the same venue so I could oversee every detail myself (bridezilla much?).

6. I almost got my Black Belt in Tae Kwon Do. My mum and I did Martial Arts for quite a few years when I was young but once I got to High School it started to interfere with my studies and I stopped training just before I sat for my Black Belt. My mum continued training and DID get her Black Belt.

7. I watch far too much TV. Right now as I type this for instance, I am watching My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding. I also love Real Housewives in any City, Skins, Gossip Girl (the shame), Underbelly and Man vs. Food. I am so glad we have Foxtel so I can tape my favourite shows then stay up late watching them in peace, although I probably would have been much happier if I didn’t have all these extra channels to choose from.

8. I rarely wear makeup, but I have a bathroom cabinet overflowing with a ridiculous amount of cosmetics for the times when I can actually be bothered. I am however, very meticulous about getting my eyebrows waxed as regularly as possible.

9. My nick-name is “wench”. My mum started it while I was in High School and it has stayed with me all this time. Luke hardly ever calls me Erin, I am so used to answering to wench that I don’t give it a second thought. Friends who don’t know the story behind it often think I should be offended, but it has never bothered me. Call me “woman” however, and I may just star-kick you into next week.

10. I am an Aquarius. No particular significance to me but people seem to nod knowingly when they hear this. While we are being all astrological, I have an unusually large number of Gemini’s in my life including Luke and one of my best friends. I am not sure if I take sort of thing too seriously, but surely its not a coincidence that I am so drawn to them?